When I was a kid my mom used to say to me, “95% of what you worry about never happens.” She recognized that I was the “worrying type” and was trying to help ease my mind. Although this rarely worked, I appreciated her sentiment and know now that she was right. For as long as I can remember, I have been a worrier. I continue to work on this, let it go, forgive myself for it, and choose different ways of being in the face of my fear. And, I still find myself worrying all the time – about money, about the future, about how things will turn out, about what people think about me, about the well-being of my loved ones, about the state of the world, and much more.
No matter how much we worry, it never works. And, as we look deeper at what worrying really is…it is a set-up for failure, a negative attractor, and a denial or avoidance of feeling our true feelings. When we worry, we are really getting ourselves ready to be upset or angry…assuming something will not work out in the future. Based upon the law of attraction, our worrying not only creates stress, it has an impact (usually negatively) on what we create and manifest. More deeply, worry is really a superficial emotion, like stress, it is something that we are all familiar with, can share with others in a way that will garner sympathy and empathy, and is easy for us to go through day to day life experiencing. Underneath our worry, are usually deeper emotions like shame, fear, guilt, hurt, or anger, many of which are much more difficult for us to feel and express.
If we are able to tell the truth, face our deeper feelings, and go down into this darkness, we will not have to waste our time with worry, we can deal with the root of the issue, not the superficial impact of it (which is what worry usually is).
There is nothing wrong with feeling scared, angry, hurt, and even “worried,” in and of itself. These emotions, like love, gratitude, excitement, joy, and others are very important to our human experience. Emotions that are felt deeply and expressed appropriately are positive and give us power (regardless of what they are). Emotions that are not felt deeply, that are denied or avoided, and are note effectively expressed, are negative and can be damaging.
Worry is always a sign that there are some deeper feelings and issues for us to address. It is a good reminder for us to get more real, take better care of ourselves, and pay attention. The best things for us to do when we get worried are:
1) Ask ourselves, what is underneath my worry (i.e. why am I really worried)
2) Face, feel, and express these underlying emotions – get support from others in this process if we need it
3) Once we have felt and expressed these emotions, choose how we want to feel and what we want to create
4) Appreciate ourselves for the courage to be honest and to deal with our emotions
5) Focus on the good stuff in our lives (i.e. be grateful for what we have, who we are, and what we are going through)
If we can bring this level of awareness and consciousness to our worry and to our lives in general, we can create real freedom and power for ourselves.