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Archives for October 2021

The Importance of Self-Trust

October 25, 2021 5 Comments

How well do you trust yourself?

For most of us, myself included, self-trust can be tricky.

Many of us second guess ourselves. We don’t listen to our gut, trust our instincts, or we hang onto negative memories or regrets from the past. These things and others can make it difficult for us to trust ourselves and thus create challenges in our relationships, work, and lives.

But you’re not alone. Lack of self-trust, while debilitating in many ways, is quite common. We all doubt ourselves sometimes – but that doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with us. It’s perfectly normal.

So how do you stop doubting yourself and start living an authentic life full of self-love, confidence, and truth?

Like most important aspects of our life and growth, the first step in our expansion process is to notice and tell the truth about why it can be difficult.

In the case of self-trust, once we can honestly acknowledge our challenges (and have some compassion for ourselves), we can consciously choose to trust ourselves in a more authentic way.

When we bring some mindful self-awareness and get curious about why we doubt ourselves or lack self-trust, that’s when we begin to learn about ourselves, our insecurities, and what we can do to grow as human beings.

What makes it difficult or challenging for you to trust yourself fully?

Take a moment to consider this question. The more compassionately aware we can be, the more likely we can move beyond it and let go of our “story” about why we can’t trust ourselves.

How to Build Self-Trust

Here are a few things you can do to enhance your ability to trust yourself:

1) Listen to yourself

We all have inner wisdom. Some refer to this as our intuition, others call it our gut, and others relate to it as our higher consciousness. Whether you call it one or all of these things (or something else), I believe that we’re all very intuitive. A big part of trusting ourselves is understanding that we each have a deep sense of what is true and right for us in most situations. As we practice listening to this inner wisdom (through meditation, prayer, quiet time, breath, conscious thought, and more), we begin to trust ourselves on a deeper level.

2) Don’t be afraid to fall

Remember: we all fail sometimes – but that doesn’t mean that we should ever give up on pursuing our dreams and goals. Be willing to take risks, go for it, and make mistakes. When you fall, get back up. So often, we don’t try things because we think we might fail. I love Wayne Gretzkey’s famous quote about this: “I missed 100% of the shots I never took.” While it can be scary for us to take risks in life, one of the greatest ways we can build our capacity for self-trust is to go for it, even if we fail. As we build up our ability to take risks, we also grow our capacity for courage, expanding our ability to trust ourselves.

3) Forgive yourself

Many of us live in a constant state of guilt, disappointment, or shame, which is not the healthiest way to live. We’re only human. We make mistakes, and we learn from them. One of the main reasons we don’t trust ourselves is that we haven’t forgiven ourselves for mistakes we’ve made, the pain we’ve caused, or the regrets we have. These demons from our past haunt us, and we use them as evidence to not go for things and not trust ourselves. As we enhance our capacity to forgive ourselves, we heal from the past and breathe new life into our experience, creating a genuine sense of enthusiasm for both the present moment and our future. And, as we’re able to forgive ourselves, we can let go of our attachment to being perfect and having to do everything just right, which allows us to trust ourselves more freely.

Are You Struggling With Self-Trust?

Here are a few other things you can do to boost your self-trust:

  • Be decisive
  • Honor your emotions
  • Set reasonable goals
  • Be kind to yourself
  • Practice self-care
  • Be yourself
  • Spend time with yourself
  • Take risks
  • Reward yourself

Think of something important in your life right now – a decision you’ve been on the fence about because you’re worried about making the wrong choice (i.e., not trusting yourself).

Given what we’ve been discussing here, what would you do regarding this vital issue if you fully trusted yourself? I bet if you listen to your inner wisdom, allow yourself to take a risk, and know that you can forgive yourself no matter what happens – the answer to the question, “What should I do?” is probably pretty clear.

What can you do to enhance your self-trust and listen to your inner wisdom more? Share your thoughts, action ideas, insights, and more here on my blog below.

I have written five books about the importance of trust, authenticity, appreciation, and more. In addition, I deliver keynotes and seminars (both in-person and virtually) to empower people, leaders, and teams to grow, connect, and perform their best. Finally, as an expert in teamwork, leadership, and emotional intelligence, I teach techniques that allow people and organizations to be more authentic and effective. Find out more about how I can help you and your team achieve your goals today. You can also listen to my podcast here.

Liked this post? Here are three more!

Are You Bringing Your Whole Self to Work?
Prioritizing Our Mental Health
Facing Challenges: How to Appreciate and Learn From Them

This article was published on January 29, 2015, and updated for 2021.

Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: forgiveness, inner wisdom, Mike Robbins, mistakes, risk, Self-trust

Being Bold : What Does it Mean to You?

October 8, 2021 7 Comments

What does being bold mean to you? 

Bold people are daring and courageous—they’re not afraid to break the rules. They have their own identity and are willing to express it. 

Are you that type of person?

Do you consider yourself bold?

Some of us do, but most people I know and work with, myself included, admit that they don’t often think of themselves as bold.  

Even when some of us have moments of boldness, these moments can be scary and are often few/far between.

Why is this?

Because we sometimes don’t have the courage to be bold or we don’t find ourselves going for it in our work and our life—or not nearly as much as we’d like (especially during these difficult times).

Being bold is essential to living a fulfilling life

While scary and challenging for many of us, being bold is essential if we’re going to live an authentic, successful, and fulfilling life.  Boldness is about stepping up and stepping out onto our edge in life—pushing the limits of what we think is possible or even appropriate.  

It’s about living, speaking, and acting in ways that are both courageous and true to who we are.

Because we’re all unique, our individual versions of boldness will look quite different.  

Something that might be bold for me may not be so for you—or vice versa.  Going for it has to do with us getting in touch with our deepest truths, passions, and desires in life and then having the courage to live and act out loud in a way that is congruent with this.

5 Tips On How to Be Bold

Here are five key reminders of what it takes to be bold and go for it in life:

1. Be True to Yourself

A part of being bold includes having the ability to honor yourself, your emotions, and the things you believe in.

Tell and live your truth with courage, vulnerability, and commitment.  

Think about who you are and what is important to you. Don’t be afraid to admit when you’ve made a mistake, gone off course, or done something that’s out of integrity for yourself.

Remember that we all feel lost at times. Being true to who we are is about being ruthlessly honest and also forgiving ourselves (and others) fiercely and compassionately.

2. Live with Passion

Passion comes from within us, not from the external circumstances, events, activities, or people in our lives. 

Being bold is about going for it, not holding back, and giving ourselves fully to our work, relationships, and lives.  

To be bold, we must live with passion and be true to that passion. 

3. Step Out

Don’t be afraid to challenge yourself.

Say and do things that are outside of your comfort zone. Do things that scare you. 

When you start to challenge yourself, you force yourself to step out in life and to step more fully into who you really are. 

Sometimes when we try to step out of our comfort zone, we get scared. We don’t think we’re ready, we sometimes don’t know exactly what we’re supposed to do, and we rarely have a guarantee that things will work out.  So what. 

As Ray Bradbury famously said, “Jump and build your wings on the way down.”

4. Create a Dream Team

Never be afraid to ask for support and lean on others. Sometimes our support systems are what can help us get through challenging times.

Support, inspiration, and accountability from other people are essential along our journey of boldness and authenticity.  

You can’t do it all by yourself, which is why it is so important to understand when to reach out to others who believe in you, will tell you the truth, and can help you when you get stuck.  

Create a “dream team” of powerful and supportive people around you with whom you can share your hopes, dreams, and ideas.  Be willing to ask for and receive their support, contribution, and generosity.

5. When You Fall, Get Back Up 

We all fall – and that’s okay.

It’s essential to make peace with the fact that you will fall, probably a lot, especially if you’re going for it and playing big in life.  

How we respond to falling down is what truly makes the difference in our lives. How we get back up when we fall is how we become bold.

When we’re willing to get back up, dust ourselves off, be honest about how we feel, and not let it stop us from going for what we want – we tap into what true power, boldness, and authenticity are all about!

What are you willing to do in your life right now to step out and go for what you want boldly? Share your thoughts, ideas, insights, actions, and more on my blog below.

I have written five books about the importance of trust, authenticity, appreciation, and more. In addition, I deliver keynotes and seminars (both in-person and virtually) to empower people, leaders, and teams to grow, connect, and perform their best. Finally, as an expert in teamwork, leadership, and emotional intelligence, I teach techniques that allow people and organizations to be more authentic and effective. Find out more about how I can help you and your team achieve your goals today. You can also listen to my podcast here.

 

Liked this post? Here are three more!

  • Speaking Your Truth to Live a Life of Authenticity
  • How to Embrace Disappointment and Learn From it
  • The Power of Gratitude

 

This article was published on February 17, 2011, and updated for 2021.

Filed Under: Blog, Emotions, Life Tagged With: Appreciation, authenticity, boldness, courage, gratitude, Mike Robbins, Motivational Speaker, resilience, self-help, support

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