In this solo episode, I’m diving into feedback. Here’s the thing about feedback, in general, for me — I don’t always love it. But really, receiving feedback (and giving it) is so important to growth. I share my recent experience of receiving feedback from my editors on my latest manuscript, and how having a “sweaty-palm” conversation really helped move me forward with integrating that feedback. We can all benefit from enhancing our capacity to give and receive feedback, so I have some strategies to move ourselves from a space of defensiveness and self-criticism, into a growth mindset and openness of receiving and accepting feedback.
[2:23] What stands between you and the relationships you really want to have with people is a 10-minute ‘sweaty-palm’ conversation you’re too afraid to have — but they’re such a critical part of every single relationship.
[3:21] There are two primary areas where you might have a ‘sweaty-palm’ conversation — conflict and feedback.
[7:00] When we get feedback from someone, there are often three beats that go off in our heads simultaneously. 1) Defensiveness, 2) Self-criticism or self-loathing, 3) Growth mindset.
[20:34] We don’t give or receive nearly as much feedback as we probably need to. Why? Because we’re uncomfortable.
[22:09] How can you get more feedback in the way that you want? Ask for it.
[24:07] Feedback is more a function of the relationship than the way the feedback is given. It takes time to cultivate a relationship to that level of trust where feedback can be freely given and received.
[25:06] We can set up an environment both in our minds and in our relationships where we can receive feedback from others openly and with a growth mindset.
[30:34] We can all benefit from enhancing our capacity to give and receive feedback.
“We don’t give nearly as much feedback as we probably need to. Why? Because we’re uncomfortable.” — @mikedrobbinsClick to tweet
“Feedback is so much a function of the relationship we have with the person we’re getting the feedback from. It’s way less a function of how the feedback is given.” — @mikedrobbinsClick to tweet